10 secrets every awkward guy needs to know about winning an incredible woman’s heart.

He’s fifteen going on fifty. Face riddled with acne,neck plastered with eczema and is so skinny that he dodges the water droplets whenever he takes a shower.His father has high hopes of him becoming a soccer star, but just last week his son faked yet another asthma attack so that he would spare everyone the trauma of watching him play football. He wants to fit in but seems to be looking from the outside in.He’s uncool in every sense of the word.

If cultural activities were a sport,he’d be the captain.In fact,he decided to attend this prestigious,all boys high school solely because at the age of ten, he heard the senior boys choir of this school sing and was enthralled. His peers have questioned his sexuality due to the fact he’s developing an interest in fashion and he’s  never really  been into heavy Rap and Hip Hop music but prefers soulful R’n’B. Rummaging through his dad’s Old Skool record collection is high up on his list of priorities.

He loves drama. For a reason unknown to mankind,he lands himself all the female roles but hey,this is what they did back in Shakespeare’s day right?Later on this year he will be cast as Lady Macduff in the school’s production of Macbeth. He will stand in that costume with cleavage that was sewn on lopsidedly. He will scream and run off stage in front of 200 plus spectators from his school as well as different girl schools from across Zimbabwe.

This ladies and gentlemen was me.I loved my secondary education and have such fond memories of my high school experience. It’s just that I used to suffer from intense stage fright when it came to any form of interaction with women.My legs would turn to jelly,my sweatglands would go into overdrive and Hopper the frog would ask for the GPS coordinates to my voicebox.I was both shy and awkward to say the very least.

Please go ahead and read the 10 pointers I wish 25 year old Tinashe, who is still grateful for Toni Braxton and Indie Arie’s music,had given 15 year old Tinashe all those years ago as a way of guiding him in his interaction with women.

1) Move in the same circles (find common ground):

We naturally gravitate towards people with similar interests, be it serving together at a local church;analysing poetry for hours on end, during an extra literature lesson next door or travelling. Doing Group activities with people who are passionate about the same things not only levels the playing field, but it also improves interaction.

Constantly doing things in a group set up affords you the opportunity to see how other people communicate and carry themselves. With time,you’ll begin to notice ‘THE ONE.’ Let’s call this phenomenon:‘the only person in the room syndrome’. That syndrome which causes you block out all other options.

2) Initiate and lead:

So she also loves the poem, ‘Composed Upon Westminster Bridge’ by William Wordsworth, you know this because you heard her recite it so eloquently. After counting from 1 to 10 in your head a hundred times over, you have finally plucked up enough courage from the heavens to step up to her. There’s no backing out now as you’re standing face to face. After much stuttering, you managed to get a number,her real number at that.Congratulations,this is but the beginning of what could be an exciting journey.

Take the initiative to ask her out on a date,it doesn’t have to be extravagant,coffee is usually a winner. When you ask,do yourself a favour and  call her rather than sending a text message. It shows courage on your part.

3) Accept rejection with arms wide open:

I have a confession,I have this nagging,constant fear of rejection. You know what I’m talking about? The fear that prevents you from approaching the woman of your dreams because you feel inferior?She is after all,the most popular girl in town.

The truth is, fear cripples and prevents you from propelling forward. I approached my older brother on the subject of rejection and these were his thoughts:

“Young man,you need to desensitise yourself  against the fear of rejection. Men have been hunters for centuries now. They didn’t always catch prey, but each day brought a fresh new challenge to bring game back home.”

He was saying that as a man,you should forget the disappointment of the previous day and go out again full of expectation. Rejection doesn’t kill a man,it only leads him closer to a relationship he will value more. Rejection is part and parcel of manhood.

4) Call a friend:

Thankfully you didn’t have to scream into your pillow last night,because she took you up on your offer. A day has been arranged for the first date.At this stage remember that  every David needs a Jonathan. This is the wing-man,the best friend who knows you inside out,values and belief systems included. The guy who will speak up on your behalf when you swallow your tongue. He knows that you’re head over heels for this girl and will lovingly support and encourage you.

In some instances,he will do a thorough background check of the girl, and may go as far as finding out what her shoe size is, Anyone ever heard about Facebook stalking? When necessary,he will offer a word of caution and will help you think clearly because he knows that at this point, the emotions and the daily overdose of Dopamine from your brain are doing most of the thinking for you. He however,respects the fact that you’re mature enough to make a decision.

5) Process the awkwardness-awkward moments make for great stories!

It’s the night before the date. Two buses,a train and a plane have brought you to this moment. Your feet are frozen to the ground and your blood is boiling. Your mind is screaming :

“Like seriously dude,what the *@#!  are we doing here?!”

You read point #3 about accepting rejection again but that doesn’t cut it. You send an SOS to Jonathan, who steps in and encourages you.

Feeling a bit nervous and awkward about the first date is perfectly normal. Remember she’s probably feeling the same. Just think of the song ‘Relax,take it easy’ by Mika. Awkward moments like spilling your Spicy Vanilla Chai Latté all over yourself or grabbing hold of her hand for the first time will make for great stories in the future.

6) Be Authentic:

Honesty is honestly the best policy.Women love men who are honest about who they are and what their interests are.Don’t try wear shoes that don’t fit as walking in someone else’s identity will eventually get uncomfortable. Unfortunately we all can’t be Hulk Hogan. Say for example she supports Arsenal and you don’t know a thing about football. You’ve heard about David Beckham and you say:

“I also love the Gunners,remember that year David Beckham scored that epic goal,which resulted in them winning the Barclays FA Cup Premier League Final?”

Dude,you’re clearly not a football fanatic so you don’t have to pretend to be one. Do however tell her what your interests are. This paves the way for deep conversation that goes beyond the surface. This will let her into your mind and let’s her see how you think and see the world.

7) Show her that chivalry still exists:

N.B BRING YOUR MANNERS!!! Just the other day,my friend was expressing her disappointment in men she’s gone out on dates with. There was no opening and holding of doors,no chairs were pulled out for the young lady and things got awkward when the guy expected her to foot the bill. I know, shocking right?The sad reality is the fact that many women don’t even expect chivalry anymore. Gentlemen,this is not on.Jay-Z may have tried to kill auto tune but show her that her time is valuable to you by being chivalrous. CHILVARY IS NOT DEAD!

8) Honour and respect her:

In line with being chivalrous, lead the conversation but allow her to talk. Listen to what she says and maintain eye contact. She deserves your full attention and will appreciate the time spent together if she feels like you  heard her out.

Communication does indeed go both ways but she will be grateful for the fact that the conversation was not only centered around you and your love for the gym. Remember to compliment her and to tell her how beautiful she is especially since she took the time to look good for you.

9) Take a breath mint:

Congratulations,you’ve now reached the stage in your relationship where it’s no longer about coffee dates. At this stage you’re comfortable enough to take her to the ‘Two for one burger special’ at Spur on a Monday. The first Spur date went so well that you’ve taken things up a notch. I’m talking ALL YOU CAN EAT RIBS BABY!!! You picked her up at 8 pm sharp,got to Spur,held the door and remembered to pull out a chair for her.The rack of ribs kept coming,the Windhoek Lager flowed,she enjoyed the sweet rosé,you chewed on the bones,she loves the fact that you can eat so much and you loved the onion rings. Well that’s exactly my point; brother man,remember the breath mint so as not to offend your girl with offensive contagious onion breath.Can I get an amen?!

Okay,okay,it’s not so much about the breath mint but more about grooming. We all have a unique style we identify with but at least try not to look like sloppy Joe.

10)Accommodate her friends:

“If you wanna be my lover,you gotta get with my friends.”-The Spice Girls

By now,she has told her closest girlfriends about what’s been going on.Her best friend has gone as far as following you on all the social media platforms that you subscribe to. You better make sure that you have a clean track record bro, as the best friend doesn’t want her friend to get hurt.

Women tell their friends everything from the get go. This usually happens in general conversation, whilst they paint each other’s nails, as they dream about the perfect way a guy should propose and fantasise about what the wedding day will be like.Ha ha,excuse the intense generalisation. As a man,prepare yourself for the level excitement her friends will have,if they like you that is and as far as possible allow them to walk with you in your relationship journey.

Every awkward Tom,Dick and Harry’s story is unique. There’s no particular set of rules that one can follow per se,however the very first important bold step is approaching the woman you like. It’s pointless to let your feelings for her eat away at you especially if she doesn’t know that you’re interested in her.

“Take a step forward lads – it will be easier that way.” Robert Erskine Childers

All the best Bro, I’m behind you all the way,before you quit reading this post and ask the girl out for coffee,please leave a comment and share this post with your awkward friends on Facebook and Twitter.

If you’d like to receive free updates straight to your email,when a new post is ready for your reading pleasure please follow the link below to subscribe to my blog. Thank you.

http://eepurl.com/be4wvL

Dear Intern: 20 Things your lecturer won’t tell you about being a young Professional.

The 1st of February will go down in history as one of the most important days of my life,and no,there is no sand in any hour glass. The reason why this day is so important to me is because it marked the end of my year as a Pharmacist Intern.

It was a tough year to say the very least; a year in which my character went under triple bypass and then plastic surgery . The year had its fair share of battles that had to be fought and with them came many victories that were won.I thought I was prepared for the year that has just passed and in certain instances I was. However, It would have  helped if I had been told a little more about the School of Life,before I had enrolled.

Here are a few pointers and lessons that I learnt along the way my dear intern friend:

1) Work is work so leave it at work.

Why carry the weight of the day back home with you? As soon as you clock out forget about the day that has just passed,go home,prepare a hearty meal and relax. Tomorrow will take care of itself.

2) Don’t take things personally!

Just before my sister dropped me off at the airport  in February 2014,she gave me this little pearl of wisdom and she was right. Some of my unhappiest moments were when I had taken things to heart. If you know that something isn’t true,why let it fester?

3)Ask if you are not sure.

Our profession is a serious one in that we are dealing with people’s lives. You always have to have a double check. My one colleague once said that it’s better to ask and be sure than to harm a patient . Don’t get it twisted, there is no such thing as YOLO when you are picking medication for a patient.

4) Go in with an attitude of wanting to learn.

When you feel like you know everything,ask what else you can learn.Once you feel like you’ve arrived,brush up on what you already know. In essence,learning is a continuous process and you actually never really arrive.

5) Order your day.

Mama was right,to-do lists are amazing . You will more than likely be bombarded with tasks and it’s easy to forget a thing or two during the course of the day. My advice to you is this,write your to do list in the morning,check it at midday and again at  the end of the day.

WARNING:DO NOT FORGET TO ASSESS THE FRIDGE TEMPERATURE!!!

6) Celebrate the small victories.

Such as passing your preregistration exam and being found competent in all your Competence Standards. Also celebrate things like delivering scheduled medication to the wards on time and ticking everything off your to do list.

7) Learn to laugh.

At yourself and with your workmates. I quite enjoyed putting on a British accent and my best Indian accent,owing to the fact that I worked in Chatsworth. I used to struggle with pronouncing some names and surnames when handling doctor queries. Naturally this resulted in laughter.

Me:”Good day doctor,it’s Tinashe calling from the Pharmacy at ABC Hospital.Patient X has a Penicillin allergy and I see you have prescribed Adco-ceftriaxone.”

Doctor: “I’m sorry,but do you mind repeating that name.”

Me: “Ummm…Patient X.”

(Long pause then laughter is heard from the other end of  the telephone).

8) Stay humble.

Okay so we know that you went to University and  obtained a Degree with honours,we also know that you have all this book knowledge. Congrats my friend,that’s awesome but in many instances you may not have that much work experience and you may find that you won’t use much of what you were taught in lectures. This is when humility should step in,as everyone will be your teacher. From the finance clerk,to the student,to the assistant right through to the Pharmacists and Pharmacy Manager.

9)Think things through logically.

This will help when you are put under the spotlight or called into THE OFFICE to explain how you ordered “Two Bazillion Rands” worth of stock..or delivered drugs to the incorrect ward..gasp!

10) Build a safety net.

This should be a network of close friends and family, with whom you can share your frustrations with. These are the friends that will be there to pick you up when you fall. They will also help you see opportunities for growth,when you yourself can’t see them. They will rebuke you from a place of love if you keep dropping the ball and laugh at your pain, but thankfully not in a mocking way.

11) Shake it off Like Taylor Swift.

Truth be told,

“The haters are gonna hate,HATE, HATE!”

If people say that “You are lightning on your feet,” then you will definitely need to shake it off. Oh my word, I just understood what that phrase means..ha ha!

To everyone who isn’t a Taylor fan,you are forgiven but at least remember the legend of  Edwardo the Spanish Donkey who got stuck in a well.The villagers didn’t know how to get him out so they decided to fill the well up with sand. As more dirt was thrown at him,he shook it off and took a step up until he eventually climbed up out of the well.

12) Do not, in fact never disqualify yourself!

It’s unhealthy and hinders growth and development. Rather ask for pointers on how you can improve. Instead of agreeing with negative feedback use it as a stepping stone for growth. When you keep being told the same thing over and over,it’s perhaps time for a little introspection. Ask yourself,why do my supervisors keep saying the same thing?

13) Use your leave to do something epic.

Staying at home is lame,visit a new Province,go wine tasting or hiking . N.B:Remember to hand your responsibilities over to someone else when you go on leave.If you don’t,no one will do the work for you. #Justsaying.

14) Weekends are sacred.

Use them not only to rest but to also explore and get lost in the City.I found that this gave me perspective and sharpened my desire to work harder. Resting will give you a fresh outlook on the week that lies ahead.

15) You only have two hands.

It’s okay to say I can’t right now or I’ll get to it once I’m finished with the  task I’m currently completing. Unfortunately,not everyone has super human strength like Chuck Norris or Idris Elba.

16) Keep it professional.

Although some of your colleagues may end up being good friends. Just remember that work is work. You are not at work to have a good time but to add value and to ensure that the work gets done.

17) Double check your work and pay attention to detail.

Pharmacists are meant to be meticulous . Every single step must be double checked.

18)Set goals at the beginning of each month.

Monitor your progress against a monthly year planner. This will highlight areas of growth and show you any gaps that need to be addressed.By the end of the year,you will be surprised by how much you’ve learnt.

“He who adds to something,little by little makes it grow.”

19)When it wasn’t you,say it wasn’t you.

Why should you take the fall for things you didn’t do? When you do make a mistake, own up. You might get hung out to dry,excuse me for being crude,but a solution will be found. Small mistakes that are dealt with at grass roots level,will not escalate into veld fires.

20) Never give up!!!

When you think about quitting or don’t feel like going to work,think of the bigger picture. Why did you take this internship on in the first place? What were you hoping to achieve by the end of it? Also remember what Sir Winston Churchill said:

“Never give in. Never give in. Never,never,never,never-in nothing great or small,large or petty – never give in,except to convictions of honour and good sense.”

In hindsight, I had a fantastic year. The exposure that I gained opened my eyes to what Pharmacy has to offer as a career. The lessons learnt will be of great use in the seasons to come and I’m indebted to my workmates and friends who supported me along the way. All the best for the year,you will do well!I’m routing for you!

To receive updates on my move to Swartruggens and to find out how I’m fairing in Afrikaans/Tswana territory as I complete my Community Service,please follow the link below to fill in the sign up form it’s totally free and won’t take time “Bai dankie”. Also please don’t forget to drop a comment.

http://eepurl.com/be4wvL

The Chatsworth dictionary for dummies: 18 Useful phrases that will get you from Unit 1 to 11.

My time in Chatsworth is sadly coming to an end and I’ve been reflecting on the year that has passed. After getting over the culture shock and settling down, one tends to pick up a few mannerisms,words and phrases along the way. Here is a list that you must keep at readily your disposal,you may find it useful when you next visit Chatsworth or if you are thinking of relocating.

1)To “vye” is a verb,an action word that means to go  and “posy” is a noun which means home.

“I’m vying posy now.”

Means I’m going home now. This phrase is usually thrown around 2 minutes before its time clock out and get off duty.

2) “Oyooooh! ” is an expression of shock,disbelief or surprise. It is closely related to the Zulu “Awe ma!”  But stems from the Xhosa expression,”Tjoh!”Here is an example of how it can be used:

“Oyooooh ma! I can’t believe he said that about his stekkie,man!”

3) A stekkie is a girl. In these parts, having a stekkie is apparently a bachelor’s  solution to  home cooked meals and ironed clothes. Sexist much?! Ummm yeah!

4) An “owtie/outie” is a guy . However,a more commonly used phrase for a guy is “larnie.”

“Hey man,this owtie has lekker puma shoes,man!”

or

” I wanted to give that larnie one back hand because of what he said about my stekkie!”

5) Just in case you missed the MSC Cruise to the Portuguese Islands, lekker is Afrikaans for cool. Speaking of cruises, going on one would be lekker minus the sea sickness.

6) If you didn’t understand the second example in point number 4,a “Backhand” is a slap. One backhand dealt properly is apparently so effective that it will turn Mister T’s mohoc into a Brazilian weave.

7) A “Speech” is a fight.

“When I was in grade 9, there was a big speech between the the grade tens and  grade elevens.”

8) “This thing”, is a cliff hanger phrase. When deep in conversation, the phrase “this thing” is often thrown in for good measure and as the listener you are left wondering, ummm “What thing?” For example:

“I was supposed to get paid on the 24th of December, but my this thing did not reflect in my account.”

“I went to the bank the other day and as the teller went through my documents,she asked for proof of my this thing.”

9) A “fro” is a wife. This word was adopted from Afrikaans and I suspect from the love most Indians have for 7 de Laan. An example,

“Once I’ve liked it and put a ring on it, my stekkie is going to become my fro.”

10) “Doll” and “My baby” are especially used by Indian Aunties when they want to butter you up, particularly when they’ve done something wrong.  These phrases are also used as terms of endearment.

11)”Bring and come.” Means exactly that silly. Let’s see how it can be  used in a sentence;

“Bring the masala and come with it here, so that we can add  it to the this thing,my baby.”

12) “Y’all.” Is an encompassing phrase. Everyone takes one for the team or is somehow involved when things turn pear shaped in this part of the world.

13) “To come right.” is used when things work out.

“Did things come right with your fro?”

Let’s be perfectly honest though, things didn’t come right with the cast members of South Africa’s very own television series, Generations. I mean, 16 main actors fired at once? I’ll hand it to them,they definitely put up a good speech for salary increases.

14) “Swear you!” Means to be shouted at,scolded or sworn at for doing something wrong like packing antifungal capsules into the box of suppositories by mistake.

“This doctor will swear you so bad, if you call him on his Cell before 5 pm.”

15) “Right?” Is used to gauge whether or not you understand how things should be done. It is used commonly when an explanation is being given.

16) “And all”, is used to add emphasis and to make a story more riveting.

“On Christmas day,my aunty made butter chicken curry,vegetable biryani,dholl, soji and all.”

17) “Oh,so nice!” Is used to show one’s excitement and joy.

Me: “Aunty my closest friends are getting married in April,remember the ones who came to my posy last year?”

Aunty: “Oyooooh,so nice boy! Are you going to be a groomsman and all?”

18) “Check you.”  Is another way of saying  “Catch ya later.”

Learning to communicate plays a vital role when building relationships. It becomes easier to relate to someone when you speak his/her language and when you can understand what he or she is is saying.

“Check you,I’m vying posy to watch 7 de Laan now but please don’t forget to also check out the related post about a black man living in Chatsworth,right?” 

Related:http://wp.me/p5hLyy-i

Black man in Chatsworth:10 Things I’ve come to realise about Indians

All I had known before moving to Chatsworth was diversity. When I therefore announced my move to Chatsworth,my friends and Chuck Norris would look at me with reservation and ask if I was sure about my decision. Truth be told, I hadn’t done much research about the area but when I moved it finally made sense. Thanks to Apartheid, Chatsworth was  designated as an Indian Settlement. Race has never really been a big deal for me but for the first time in my life, I was in the “minority group” and as a result more conscious of my skin tone. It’s been an interesting year and I’ve come to realise a few things.

1) Gold is th new black.

Don’t be alarmed, every other person in  Chatsworth has gold or silver plated teeth. Young and old alike. I am of the opinion that this goes hand in hand with a strong Hip Hop influence. In the beginning this used to frustrate me, but I soon learnt that character is not defined by silver or gold teeth as these will soon fade away. Ha ha,jokes.

2)Everyday is throwback Thursday #justsaying

Indian Culture in Chatsworth dictates that old school R’n’B music is cool. I’ve often found myself listening and bobbing my head  to “Return of the Mac” and Jagged Edge in a taxi full of Indian people. Singing: “If you are sexy and you know it,clap your hands!”
Well if no one else will clap, I will.

3) Let’s keep it spicy my lover and friend.

In Indian Culture spices are taken very seriously.Supermarkets like Pick’n’Pay and Checkers in Chatsworth, have overwhelmingly long spice aisles. Here you will find both grounded and ungrounded spices .The list includes :leaves;seedpods;jira;masala; somf;cinnamon sticks ,the works!When you attempt to cook your first Mutton Biryani,I strongly advise you to buy a ready packed spice mix,or alternatively you can ask Aunty Maya to mix the spices for you to your preference.

4) *Singing* “I want some hot stuff!!!”

When ordering Nandos in Chatsworth, the flavour Lemon and Herb is a myth. The benchmark flavour is Mild. Hot and extra Hot follow suit. No ladies and gentlemen,this is not a stereotype,it’s true.

5) Give and it shall be given back unto thee.

Indians will go out of their way to be generous. When I first moved into my bachelor pad, I came back home after work to find that my house had been broken into . My landlord had put a fridge,a two plate stove and an iron in my kitchen. Not to mention the curtains that had been put up. I was grateful because my transition into living alone was made that much easier.

6) Sureshneee, I’ll be there in 5 minutes.

“Indian time” is on par with,if not worse than “African time.” I was amped for men’s camp and had been told to be ready by 6 pm sharp,I got picked up at 8pm.

7) What’s the English for What’s up?

“What Kind?!” and “What you say?!” are Indian variations of the English phrase, “What’s up?!”

8) Thou shalt respect thy elders.

Indians have a deep respect for each other. The elderly are referred to as “Aunty” or “Uncle”,”Ma” or “Dad” and the young as “My girl”,”My boy” or “Baby.”

9) Let’s play 21 Questions shall we?

Indians are inquisitive. From the uncle who stops you on the street,to ask what your name is,where you are from,if you are married and have children,where you work and how much you earn to the Aunty at work who asks what you cooked for supper last night and how you cooked it . If your method of preparing your dinner is not up to scratch, she will give you tips on what you should add to improve the recipe.

10) Hey man,what’s your BBM pin?

In order to sit with the cool kids in Chatsworth, you have to have a Blackberry. This is the standard phone for most Indians. Asking: “Android software for what?!”

Culture and diversity in my opinion,shouldn’t be looked down upon but instead celebrated. There is so much that we can learn from each other and I believe that when we find common ground with people who are different,we can live,work and play together.

If you enjoyed reading this article as much as I enjoyed writing it,please remember to follow the link below to fill in the sign up form. This will enable you to receive new posts that I publish for free via e-mail. It won’t take more than a minute of your time. Thank you.

Link: http://eepurl.com/be4wvL

7 Things you should remember when you are lost in Durban and don’t speak Zulu.

1) Calm down.

Put your chin up and walk confidently. It’s easy to spot the lost sheep in a big crowd as he clumsily walks about. Trust me, you don’t want to be that guy as he is often an easy target for all “the baddies” out there.

2)To begin with, get onto the right taxi

The passengers are like your family. Say “Sawubona” in your most twang free, “African” accent. Once you’ve gotten the formalities out of the way,revert back to English and describe the place you are trying to get to. The passengers will either tell you to hop on or tell you where you’ll find the taxis you are looking for.

3) Use an efficient navigation system.

The security guard, is like Bob your uncle (not the one who gets drunk at all the family functions but the one who gives you sound advice and guidance). He is clued up on all the routes. Say you want to get to Point A via the scenic route,he will tell you to jump onto taxi B, if however you are in a hurry, he will tell you to rather jump onto taxi C,which will get you to point A via the express lane.

4) Use the buddy system.

The taxi driver and conductor are your best friends. They know how the city works and are more than happy to help in most instances,if not all. The one time I was lost, I attempted to ask a conductor for directions in Zulu.

“Upi ama Taxi eChatsworth?”

I asked and he saw right past my vain attempts . He grabbed my hand and said in English:

“Come with me!”

My heart was pounding and the adrenaline was coursing through my veins rapidly as I screamed to myself:

“Surely this is the end!”

To my surprise however,he took me right to my taxi.

5) Find the transport Mekka and get to it fast!!!

If you forget any of the above pointers at least try to remember point #5.

“All taxis in Durban,lead to the Workshop and eMarkhethe (the Market).”

These two places are like the transport hub of Durban and there you’ll find a taxi to your desired safe haven.

6)Avoid the front seat!

This applies to all taxis across the board. There seems to be an unspoken rule in South Africa that states that if you sit in the front,you’ll become the designated accountant.

This is quite a huge responsibility so one should be proficient in counting and calculating the change for all the passengers in the taxi. Things tend to go South when the bus fare is something silly like R7.50 .

One should also note that it’s impossible to cheat the driver as he knows how much he should make with each round trip.

7)Don’t talk to creepy looking strangers!!!

This one is just for kicks but by all means try not to ask the guy with blood shot eyes,sitting on the side of the road ,beer in hand,for directions. Don’t do this especially if you are holding two paper bags full of groceries from Woolies as he will be inclined to ask,

“What’s in those bags?!”

Oh,when he does ask you,walk swiftly along.

7 lessons on leadership learnt on a 6 Day,100 km trail.

I recently got back from a 6 day hiking trail. I with a group of 9 friends walked a total of 100 km on one of South Africa’s most challenging trails,the Amathole Hiking Trail,from the 2nd to the 7th of December.

There were many high points during the “expedition” as well as challenging and trying moments.

Naturally I had a lot of time to think,pray and reflect and I picked up on a few leadership principles I would love to share with you:

1) There many ways obstacles can be faced.

One can go above, below or around it. A leader paves a safe way for those following him/her by getting the obstacle(a thorny bush or loose rock) out of the way or choosing a safer alternate route.

2) A leader has foresight.

A leader looks out for markers that point to the right direction thus enabling his/her followers to get to their intended destination. The trail was marked with yellow foot prints that were painted on tree trunks or rocks (we literally followed the yellow brick road to get to our accommodation everyday during the hike).For the greater part of the hike these footprints were visible but one lapse in judgement could result in missing the marker which often resulted in being sidetracked and therefore momentarily lost.

3) A leader is not afraid of accepting assistance.

This was a humbling lesson for me. By day 4 of the hike my knees had started to cave in. Managing downhills and jumping over boulders was therefore a lot more challenging. Manouvering these obstacles was however made easier by leaning against a friend’s shoulder or pressing hard onto their hand.

4) A leader includes everyone in decision making processes.

During the course of the week we had to decide as a group on what time we would wake up and which routes we would take after having read the profile of the day to follow . For the greater part of the week we had to wake up an hour and a half before we started hiking,in both cold and wet conditions.

5) A leader passes on the baton

When tired a leader is not afraid of letting another person lead.

6) A leader instils confidence

By the end of day one I was at my wits end. We had been hiking for 9 hours and my backpack was heavy on both my waist and shoulders. To make things worse the hut was nowhere in sight. As I hiked up the last hill occasionally stopping to catch my breath, my friend who had already reached the hut turned back to help the stragglers with their bags. As he passed me he said keep going,the hut is not more than 5 minutes away. Hearing that made the last stretch all the more easier.

7)A leader is self disciplined.

Waking up early in the morning to repack before the designated starting time requires discipline. Managing resources ie food and ensuring that there is enough each day also requires discipline.

Overall,the hike was an out of body experience. Nothing beats the euphoria of making it to your accommodation especially since once you start, there is no turning back,the only option is to keep moving forward.

Stepping out of the box.

Why is it that we put everything into boxes including people?Here are a few examples:
“Only white people go hiking”
“No Tinashe you are not white,why do you want to get an open water diver’s licence?”
” My ancestors lived in the bush so why on earth would I want to go camping and sleep on the ground?”

My friend, do you even know what your ancestors looked like?? I’m not happy with the way we constantly play the race card and as a result fail to see what’s out there.

Yes we are entitled to an opinion but before you tell me to stay in doors, join me in exploring the wonder of creation. Step into my hiking boots and spend time hiking a mountain in order to see the view from the top.

Wear my fins and let the adrenalin rush through your body as the waves take you for a ride in the warm Indian ocean.

Don’t let fear stand in the way of something you might actually end up enjoying.

The curious wanderer

Hi my name is Tinashe and I am originally from Zimbabwe. I have always had a burning desire to travel and experience new cultures and through working in KZN and completing my undergraduate studies at Rhodes Univetsity,I have been living that dream.

I have found that a lot can be learnt from people of different backgrounds and that it is also possible to find common ground with anyone.

Two years ago , just after midyear exams,
I remember sitting in my room at Uni and praying for exposure  to different Nations. What happened next was unbelievable: I was offered a vacation job in which I was to look after seventeen international students from across the world. Needless to say my mind was opened through the experiences I shared with them.

After completing my undergraduate studies I moved to Chatsworth to complete a one year internship. Was I shocked by what  I saw? A lot of the time. Have I learnt anything from the experience? Tonnes.

The purpose of this blog therefore is to take you on a journey and to share the experiences I’ve had through travelling to and staying in different places.

Enjoy.